The Warm Flow

Christmas Cheer from Oliver Cassidy



CHARLIE BROWN
I just don't know, Linus. I know it's Christmas, and I know I'm supposed to be happy, but I'm not. I'm depressed.

LINUS
Charlie Brown, you're the only person I know who can take something as wonderful as Christmas and turn it into something depressing.

CHARLIE BROWN
Is that so?

LINUS
Yes, Charlie Brown, that's so. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest.

[Snoopy walks by and laughs.]

CHARLIE BROWN
Yeah? Really? Well, at least I don't suck my thumb and carry a security blanket like a punk-ass bitch.

LINUS
What? Charlie Brown, that's not-

CHARLIE BROWN
Pipe it, punk. I'm sick to death of being judged by you and everyone else in this stupis-ass town. What makes YOU so great? What makes you think you can call ME a loser? Go kill yourself, Linus. And nice name - "Linus." You stupid ass. Now excuse me while I go break Lucy's face.

[Linus wets himself as Vince Guaraldi plays chopsticks.]