The Motions

Meeting Minutes from Victor Lembrey



Severe budget cuts at Weston Industries, Inc. are responsible for the following, which took place in a rented auditorium in Santa Cruz, California on December 19th, 2005…

PIEDMONT (addressing the sparse crowd)
Okay, stop talking. I’m very pleased to introduce today’s guest speaker, Mr. Walker T. Reynaldo. Mr. Reynaldo has been giving motivational speeches since Friday, and he sort of likes the Seahawks and slicing peaches. In 1960, he was voted “Most Likely To Say ‘Goo Goo.'” He hasn’t published any books and his least favorite exercise is squat thrusts. Without further adieu, Mr. Walker T. Reynaldo…

[No applause.]

REYNALDO
Thank You, Piedmont. Okay, by a show of hands, how many people think their best days are behind them?

[A few coughs. No hands are raised.]

REYNALDO
Well, you’re all wrong. Adios, bitches!

[Reynaldo waves and exits the auditorium via moonwalk.]